Wednesday, October 10, 2007

I have to admit--sometimes i listen to delilah on lonely nights. the 'love someone tonight' discussions seem to make me feel better. strange, i know. believe me.......i know. as cheesy as it may seem, hearing peoples' sappy stories gives me a little bit of hope and helps me to gain some faith in love. it's refreshing to hear that it is working out for some people.
today i received a letter from my mother in which she gave me dating advice. bless her heart. my mom really is amazing. however, i don't think she realizes that she has made me cry the past two times i have talked to her. i try so hard to cover up the fact that i get lonely, then my mother comes along and gives me dating advice because she "doesn't want me to be lonely," which makes me come to terms with the fact that i'm lonely, which makes me cry. i always cry when i have to face up to my emotions.
anyway, my mother's letter really was very helpful today. in fact, it was an answer to a prayer. there is this guy that has been in my life for 3 years now. we met at dixie and were really good friends. that's it. well, recently he has been trying to convince me that we should be more than friends, but has failed to prove that fact to me. he tried to convince me that i should go visit him this weekend. i was planning on going and then i received the letter. my mom told me that i deserve a guy who will cherish me, and that i have so much to offer to someone. i don't know about you, but my definition of someone cherishing me is not someone who will make me drive 4 hours to see him. i deserve better than that. SO, i may be a little lonely tonight, but at least i am lonely with some self respect and with the hope that someday i will find a guy who will be willing to drive any distance to see me.

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