Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Where the heart is

With David working six days a week it is hard for us to have much quality family time.  On his days off we usually try to get out of the house and explore, which is great, but we are usually exhausted at the end of the day.  On Sunday we all snuggled in bed and took silly iPhone photos.  We laughed and laughed and laughed.  All of us.  Together.  It was perfect.  

Since moving to Washington I have been super homesick.  At least once a day I find myself missing our life back in Twin Falls.  When I went to Idaho for my family reunion I thought I wouldn't want to go back to Washington but the opposite occurred.  I couldn't wait to get back home.  I realized it doesn't matter so much where I am as long as I am with my cute little family.  We can enjoy life anywhere... even just hanging out in our pajamas.  



Saturday, August 02, 2014

messy, sticky, beautiful


                                              {july 4th}

On the fourth of july I was able to go to Cannon Beach with my cute little family.  My parents were in town as well as my good friend Lora.  

We had lunch at Mo's, a seafood restaurant right on the beach.  The view was amazing.  I decided to order fish n' chips.  I hate fish.  I thought maybe seafood would taste better if I was closer to the source.  It didn't.  The marionberry cobbler David and I shared for dessert- that was amazing.  (Or maybe I thought it was amazing because I choked down fish for lunch)?  

Immediately after lunch I was stung by a bee.  It hurt.  A lot.  I took some benedryl and walked around the beach with an ice pack on my arm.  Not how I pictured my day.  David and Hazel played in the water as I iced my arm.  I loved watching Hazel enjoy her first time at the ocean.  She loved jumping the waves.  In fact, she still pretends to jump the waves at home sometimes.  I brought my camera to take pictures but forgot to check the batteries... dead.  Cell phone it was.  

The benedryl made me groggy and as I walked down the beach I felt as though I were in a dream.  This perfect day I had planned out just wasn't happening.  You know what though?  The day was still pretty perfect.  Life is so not perfect but yet it is... that is the beauty of it.  

When I look back on that day it really doesn't matter that I hated my lunch.  I tried something new and I was with people that I love.  It doesn't matter that I was doped up on benedryl.  It probably made me less stressed when Hazel tried running into the ocean by herself.  Five billion times.  

If life always went according to plan it would be pretty boring.  This applies not only to trips to the beach but the everyday things.  Sometimes there are piles of laundry on the floor and dishes in the sink (more than sometimes at my house) and that is okay.  That is real life.  It is sticky and messy and beautiful.  When I look back though, I mostly see the beautiful.  

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Today is

                            
Life with two children is an adventure to say the least and admittedly I have been stuck in a bit of a rut lately.  The baby stays up until midnight and the toddler wakes up at seven.  IF naps happen they rarely happen at the same time for both children.  Most of the time naps are a battle that last the entire afternoon and most days just don't seem worth it.  

Scarlett won't take a bottle which means if I leave her with David to run to the grocery store (or anywhere) I have a very short time to do so.  Same goes with a baby sitter.  On Saturday we had our first date since December.  We had to stay close to home for our date in case I needed to stop by to feed Scarlett, luckily that didn't happen.   

Lately I have relied on the television more than I would like to admit and cooked and cleaned less than I would like to admit.  I blame it on the lack of sleep.  Recently, however, I read a quote that I just can't get out of my head. 

 "Today is the childhood your kids will remember."  

Not only is it the childhood they will remember it is also a time for me to remember as a parent.  

That doesn't mean everyday needs special activities.  It means I need to be present in the moment.  Instead of making it through the day i need to enjoy the day because days quickly turn to weeks, weeks to months and months to years.  These days are a short season in my life. 

Thursday, May 08, 2014

Scarlett's Birth Story

Preface to Scarlett's birth story:

I found out I was expecting Scarlett on Hazel's first birthday.  It was a bit of a surprise, but a pleasant one.  We were actually planning to start trying when Hazel turned one so it almost seemed too good to be true.  With Hazel it took us ten months of trying and we were planning for round two to take just as long- so even though we were ready for another, we weren't quite ready... if that makes sense.

My pregnancy was wonderful.  I got a little bit of morning sickness, but it only lasted a few weeks and was very mild.  I didn't have months of terrible "all day sickness" like I did with Hazel so both David and I were convinced we were having a boy.  In fact, we were certain.  We had a name picked out, I knew exactly how I was going to decorate the nursery and every time I  went to the store I looked at little baby boy clothes.  We were both shocked to find out we were having another girl.  It took us about half an hour to pick out a name.  We had never before thought of the name Scarlett but it just popped in my head and we both agreed.  Scarlett Colleen.  Colleen after David's Grandma Asay.  We toyed around with other names throughout the pregnancy but both knew she would be Scarlett.

Now for the birth story.

A week before my due date my doctor stripped my membranes.  Although I hoped, just as every woman in late pregnancy does, that this would send me into labor I knew that it wouldn't.  When I showed up at my next doctors appointment on my due date my doctor said, "I think we both knew you would make it here today."  I had dilated a centimeter more that week and decided to have my membranes stripped again.  This was a Thursday.  My doctor said if I didn't go into labor that weekend I could have my membranes stripped again on Monday.  If that didn't work he wanted to talk induction at my next appointment.  My blood pressure was pretty high and he thought it would be better to not let the pregnancy go too far past the 41 week mark.

I spent the next couple days feeling pretty discouraged.  I wasn't having any indications at all that labor was coming any time soon.  I prayed and prayed that I could go into labor on my own and /or that my blood pressure would be low enough at my next appointment so I could go into labor naturally.  On Saturday morning I wasn't feeling too well so David watched Hazel so I could sleep in.  Later that morning I had a feeling to go get my grocery shopping done.  We had a really laid back Saturday and I tried my best to enjoy it because I figured it would probably be our last Saturday as a family of three.

I made blt's for dinner and afterwards I put Barney on for Hazel to watch before bed.  I sat down to watch Barney with her and was feeling really down.  I was really discouraged I hadn't gone in to labor yet and was frustrated thinking I would have to be induced.  (TMI alert)!  At that very moment I felt a little bit of moisture.  I thought for a brief moment that my water had broken but quickly dismissed the thought.  Hazel came and sat on my lap and as I shifted I felt more moisture.  I decided to get up and use the restroom.  There were no obvious signs that my water had broken but when I wiped it was wetter than normal.  I ended up going to the bathroom three or four times before I decided yes, my water had broken.  It is definitely not like they show in the movies.  My water had also broken with Hazel and I knew if this was anything like that bad contractions wouldn't be too far behind.  I had David call our friend's, the Cooper's, who were going to watch Hazel for us while we went to the hospital.  I hurried and fixed Hazel's hair, I had already taken out her pony tail from the day and her hair was sticking up every where.  We packed some snacks and clothes for Hazel and were off.

The entire drive to the hospital I worried that my water hadn't really broken and we would be sent home.  I also tried (and tried and tried and tried) to get a hold of my parents but neither of them were answering their phones.  I did get a hold of my sister, Keisha.  She was going to run over to my parents house and let them know I was in labor.

It was a very slow night at the hospital.  In fact, I was the only one there.  The nurse at the front desk walked me back to the delivery room rather than calling someone to come get me.  I changed into a hospital gown and shortly after was tested to make sure my water had broken.  Thank goodness it had but I still was only dilated to 3 cm and 70% effaced.  She put in my IV and called the doctor to let him know I was there.  he arrived shortly after to talk about our game plan.  At this point I wasn't feeling any contractions.  Since I had tested positive for Group B Strep the doctor said he would like to start pitocin within twelve hours if I wasn't progressing.  He gave me the option to start sooner if I wanted.  I decided to start my antibiotics and keep trying to get a hold of my parents and then see where I was.

I arrived at the hospital at 7 pm and at 11 pm still was not having contractions and was still dilated to a 3 so I decided to start the pitocin.  My mom and sister, brother in law and nephew were on their way from Boise, about 2 hours away.  They started me on pitocin and although I was starting to feel contractions they were weak and far apart.  The doctor came again to check on me.  We decided to up the dosage.  Not too long after the contractions became very strong.  Within about 20 minutes I had dilated to a 6 and was completely effaced.  I tried to remember the breathing and relaxation techniques I had practiced.  I was able to relax completely between contractions but didn't do very well during them.  I decided to ditch the natural child birth I had planned (I blamed the pitocin) and get an epidural.  As soon as possible.  I have some scoliosis so they epidural took a while but once it started to kick in i felt much better.  I was still feeling quite a bit of cramping on my right side but it was not as intense.

My family arrived while I was getting the epidural, at around 12:30, and came in the room shortly after.  They were a good distraction from the pain I was still feeling.  When they started my epidural they also lowered my dosage of pitocin thinking my body didn't need it anymore.  It seemed like contractions were slowing back down.  The nurse came in at 2 am to check me and asked my family to step out for a minute.  We left Carson  in the room because he was asleep and didn't want to wake him.  When they checked me I was at a 10 and ready to push.  I told David he better take baby Carson out to the waiting room.  It wasn't long and the doctor came running in.  He was literally out of breath from running and asked if he had time to change into his scrubs.  I wasn't feeling too much of an urge to push and told him to take his time.  At this point I had a lot of adrenaline running through my body and was really shaky.  I was also really tired and remember worrying I wouldn't have enough energy to push.

When the doctor came back in he sat at the foot of my bed and told me to let him know when I felt the urge to push.  I decided to push through my next contraction.  After my first push everyone was excited because baby was right there.  After three pushes the doctor said, "How about we try one more."  I pushed once more and out she came!  Four pushes was all it took.  It was so fast and easy and wonderful.  I felt so blessed because my epidural was weak enough that I was able to feel everything without being in to much pain.  Feeling her come out was the most amazing experience of my life.  She was born at 2:23 am... just 23 minutes after my family left the room.




Tuesday, May 06, 2014

obligatory apology for blogging absence

in the past {almost} year since i last blogged we have not only added a new member to our family but we have relocated to washington.  i would say these major life changes excuse my blogging absence, right?

 Scarlett Colleen Asay
2/2/2014 2:23 a.m.
6 lbs 14 oz 20 1/2 inches 

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

first birthday

my baby girl turned one today.  i couldn't help but spend the whole day reminiscing.  thinking about where i was and what i was doing last year at this time.  thinking about how much my life has changed in the past year, how much it will continue to change.  i couldn't have asked for a better experience as a mommy.  hazel is sweet and sassy and full of life and love.  i am grateful for this year we have had and look forward to the rest of our lives together. 

Thursday, March 07, 2013

bathroom talk

this picture, taken about a month ago, is misrepresentation of mine and hazel's days together.  it is true, she used to sit and play with her toys but those days are long gone.  she now prefers opening and closing every drawer and cupboard she can reach, getting in trash cans and clothes hampers, and climbing on anything and everything.  yesterday she learned a new trick.  she learned how to flush the toilet.  i normally keep the bathroom doors closed but when i am showering or getting ready for the day (or anytime the bathroom door is open) she crawls in as fast as she can and flushes the toilet as many times as she can.  i just hope she is this enthusiastic about the toilet when it comes time for potty training. 

Wednesday, March 06, 2013

on motherhood

if it's true that good intentions pave the road to hell i'm in trouble because i have myself a pretty well paved road.  i have been meaning to update this blog since, well, the last time i updated it but it just hasn't happened.  i don't know how these 'mommy bloggers' do it; being a full time stay at home mom and keeping an updated blog is a lot of work. 

for a while i didn't update because i felt i needed some time to find my voice as a new 'mommy blogger'.  i mean really, who cares, besides me, that hazel rolled over for the first time or is in the 99th percentile for her height?  nobody really wants to read that.  then i thought i would write about these things for the sake of record keeping, then remembered that is what a journal is for.  mostly i didn't update for two reasons: one being that hazel keeps me pretty darn busy and two that half the time i feel i don't have anything exciting to write about.  my days are all pretty much the same: feed hazel (a LOT), change diapers (a LOT), read stories and if the weather permits go for a walk.  i usually try to throw getting dressed and cooking dinner into the mix.  not that i don't enjoy my life because i do, i love it.  i just find it hard to write about my everyday routine and make it exciting enough for somebody to want to read about. 

so why am i writing now?  quite simply because i love to write.

In the last five months i have continued to grow as a mother almost as much as hazel has continued to grow.  and boy has she grown.  it seems she will wear a new outfit once or twice and then it gets boxed up with the rest of her outgrown clothes.   and every time i buy diapers it seems i am buying the next size up.  you would think all this growing would make her tired but it doesn't; naps are a rare thing around here.  eating isn't though.  i can't take a drink of water or eat a bowl of cereal without having her crawling up my leg.  the girl likes to eat.  the bad thing is she likes to eat more than just food.  she will eat dirt, carpet, toilet paper....anything she can find really.  i have learned to keep the doors shut and the floors vacuumed. 

being a mom really is great though.  it amazes me watching this little person grow and develop.  i know she teaches me far more than i could ever teach her.  i have learned what unconditional love is and know that my love for her and her need for me resemble, if only in part, the love my father in heaven has for me and my constant need for Him.  this lesson, i know, is all part of His plan. 

Wednesday, October 03, 2012

under the weather

i have been feeling under the weather the past couple of days.  some weird virus david had a couple of weeks ago.  no symptoms other than headache and extreme dizziness.  and i mean extreme dizziness.  if i move my head even the slightest the entire room spins.  not fun to take care of a little one with this going on.  luckily little h has been in an extra snuggly mood.  thank heavens for that.

hope you are enjoying your october so far.  yesterday the weather was perfect so i laid a blanket on the grass and hazel and i soaked up the beautiful fall weather.  i think fresh air is one of the best medicines.   

Monday, October 01, 2012

saturday walk

 i am seriously falling in love with where i live.  on saturday we went on a beautiful walk at the perrine memorial bridge in twin falls.  i soaked up every ounce of the perfect fall weather and could not get over how gorgeous the scenery was. 

 i don't think there is anything hotter than seeing david with hazel.  he is such an amazing dad. 
 while we were there we even got to watch bridge jumpers.  seeing people jump off the bridge was amazing yet terrifying.  i held my breath every time they jumped as i waited for their parachute to open. 
 it was a perfect saturday.  the best part of moving is discovering all the newness around me.  how did you spend your weekend?